Today I was signing up to a website and long story short it asked for my height and weight. Immediately after putting in these details a BMI scale came up showing that based on this information, I was overweight and borderline obese. Ouch.
I’ve never been a skinny, beautiful girl. Growing up I always considered myself to be chubby, and I was OK with that. I’ve never been really ashamed of my body, I’ve just always accepted that I’d be the chubby girl that was vaguely funny and had good taste in music (and oh so modest). The psychopathic guy I dated when I first came to Cairns even said to me once he “loved my pudgy belly, don’t ever lose it” and I was hugely confused. Was that a compliment?? It feels like a horrible insult disguised as a compliment! Needless to say, he wasn’t good with what to say to women.
But every woman and man feels the increasing pressure on getting that “perfect” body. And frankly, it’s shit. We can all make improvements if we so wish but we shouldn’t feel bad about our imperfections. My little sister Luci and my niece Taylah will both be 13 in the next few months and I want to be able to show them how to love the skin they’re in, and love how imperfect and unique they are. I want to be a role model for them as they enter teenagerdom and all its fun and games.
It’s so easy to put ourselves down and point out everything that we hate about ourselves, but I’m turning the tables and pointing out things I love about myself.
I am brave. I can be antisocial and a complete homebody but I am always willing to step outside my comfort zone and try something new. I moved to the other side of the country by myself and where I knew nobody. I’m enrolled in two courses at the same time to completely change my career. I’ve been skydiving. The other week out on the reef I jumped from our boat into the open water by myself (mainly because there is no toilet on board and it’s so much harder for us girls!) which is something I am terrified of doing.
I am caring. If anyone needs me I will be there at the drop of the hat. I am terrible at staying in touch with people, I know this, but I care deeply about all my friends and family and would do anything I could physically do to help them when in need. I have an incredible amount of sympathy and empathy and can see the best in every single person. I can also get along with nearly everyone I meet.
I have great hair. It grows so incredibly quickly which I love, even if it costs me more money at the hairdresser, but I love it. And I actually love what the humidity up here has done to it, I now have nice soft waves naturally.
I like my eyes. They’re big and blue and when I have kids I want kids with big blue eyes like mine. Or green like Mitch’s, they’re pretty amazing as well.
I like my bum. It’s a bit too big, but in a pair of jeans or a tight skirt I think it looks good. Thank goodness it’s the fashion at the minute to show off your big bum.
I’m still not the size I want to be, but I’m working on it. A few months ago I decided I was sick of just being the chubby girl and I was tired all the time, so my friend Nikki set me onto a program, and in a short 30 days I changed my lifestyle and lost a heap of weight (in pic above). I’ve been pretty slack over the last month but I have the motivation to get back on track, and my goal is to be on Fitzroy Island beach in a bikini this summer. But so far, I’m loving how I’m feeling.
I am a hard worker. I’m in an entry level job doing something extremely basic, but I haven’t let that get me down and I’ve worked my nice bum off to get all the backlog of filing sorted and everything up to date, something which other staff are saying they’ve never seen done before.
I am positive. I have had a lot of shit thrown my way this year but with each setback I power on through and keep looking for the silver linings out of each situation. Sometimes they’re not there and that’s OK, I just need to accept it and move on. I don’t want to be brought down by negativity and I am more often than not laughing or have a smile on my face, even if it means getting in trouble at work.
And overall, I believe I am a good person. I’ve got a hell of a lot more to learn in life and I need to learn not to take everything so personally and let shit go, but it’s all part of the process of growing up, and I think I’m going to be a pretty decent adult. So no matter what, whether I’m having a fat day, or I’m all sweaty from being dragged around the block by two dogs, I will always believe that I am beautiful.
So I want everyone who reads this to get in on it with me. Leave a comment, either on the blog or on the Facebook link, and tell me AT LEAST one thing that you love about yourself. We can never have too much self-love and by empowering each other we’re going to get a hell of a lot further than bringing each other down all the time.
Lots of love,
Healing – Rudimental
Just a really good song to bop along to, it makes me feel good!