So last post I touched on being unsure on writing, and I’ve definitely backed off a lot and I feel I have nothing overly interesting to say, that there’s no clear flow of my writing, the topics are all over the place.
I’ve also decided that I need to stop being so open about everything, that I need to put up a bit of a wall because it ultimately will just bite you in the arse.
I’ve had a few cases over the last while where I have confided in people only to have them turn around and determine how I should be living my life, that what I plan for my life is not how I should be doing it. And goddamn it hurts. Because while I’m very open about my life, I don’t care about telling people intricate details, I’m not very trusting when it comes to relying on anyone, and there are very, very few people that I do feel I can rely on. Because in my confused head everyone at some point will let you down. And it’s probably why I’m a bit of a loner, a bit of a weirdo. But that’s OK, I’m learning the hard way that not everyone is wired like me, and not everyone is worth trusting. And I need to keep my distance to stop myself getting hurt, because I am so sensitive to every little detail in my life. It’s just how I am.
So, for anyone that cares, I’m going to take a break from publicly writing, I may still post occasionally to the blog site but not share for the world to see, the world to judge, the world to tell me how to live my life. Because ultimately, there’s not much I really need in life. Peace out.
Lots of love,
Lorde – Liability
I’m not a liability, the lyrics don’t really relate to me as I’m a nobody, still a great song though.